


Ignotus

by thexstarsxabove



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Adam is visiting Ronan over summer break, Drabble, First 'I Love You's are exchanged, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Post-Series, They're just happy and in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-05-06 22:18:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14657352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thexstarsxabove/pseuds/thexstarsxabove
Summary: Throughout his life, Adam had always known two things with certainty.One, he wasunknowable.No one could possibly understand him in the same way that he understood himself.This is possibly because he didn’t even understand himself in his entirety.And two, he was unlovable because of this.But Ronan Lynch had turned Adam’s two ‘facts’ upside down and disregarded them as he did with most things that he sensed were lies. Ronan LynchknewAdam. He knew him and he loved him despite the fact.Adam was still trying to wrap his head around these two concepts.





	Ignotus

" _Nunc scio quid sit amor_ -  
Now I know what love is  "  
\- Virgil, Eclogues VIII

-

Throughout his life, Adam had always known two things with certainty.  
One, he was _unknowable_.  
No one could possibly understand him in the same way that he understood himself.  
This is possibly because he didn’t even understand himself in his entirety.  
And two, he was unlovable because of this.

But Ronan Lynch had turned Adam’s two ‘facts’ upside down and disregarded them as he did with most things that he sensed were lies. Ronan Lynch _knew_ Adam. He knew him and he loved him despite the fact.

Adam was still trying to wrap his head around these two concepts.

As he sat on the porch of The Barns, legs brushing the weeds and soft grass below, he watched Ronan from across the way.  
He was sitting cross legged in the field with a silver bucket that gleamed in the sunlight. Animals swarmed him like he was a god - dream creatures and natural ones alike. A large white stag stood at the center, all of them accepting food from Ronan’s hand with complete and utter trust.  
Beside Ronan, sat Opal.  
Adam watched as the strange girl put some of the animal feed experimentally into her own mouth causing Ronan to snatch the bucket away from her.  
“ _What the hell, Opal?_ What did I tell you about eating weird shit?” His eyebrows were pulled together in sternness but his voice dripped with hints of fondness.  
She stared at Ronan with wide mischievous eyes and he stared back until his facade broke and he cracked a smile.  
“Here,” He grunted, handing her another handful of the feed. “Hold your hand out like this.”  
She did as instructed to and Adam watched as the deer and squirrels and other creatures moved towards her. The white stag leaned down first, sniffing before licking the food clean off of her hand.  
She shook the slobber off, a wide grin on her face that now matched Ronan’s.  
Adam’s heart swelled with love.

There was a point in his life where he’d thought he’d been incapable of love. A loveless boy born into a loveless world. That was all he knew.

Ronan, on the other hand was born from a world of love. Rich with love and affection. Adam would have thought he’d be jealous but oddly enough he wasn’t.  
Ronan had endured a whole hell of a lot of tragedy in his young years and he needed that love. Adam _wanted_ him to have that love.  
And in return, he’d shared that love with Adam.

_I love him_ , Adam thought experimentally testing the words in his head. _I’m in love with Ronan Lynch_.

It was true. Everything about the words felt right. They made his heart feel far too big in his chest. Like it was a machine built for only tiny doses of affection, currently being destroyed by the thunder storm that was Ronan Lynch’s love.  
It hurt- in the best way possible.

Lifting himself from the porch step, Adam stretched before making his way over to the happy circle in the middle of the field.  
Ronan was still smiling, bursting with a happiness that Adam wouldn’t have been able to imagine on him a few months ago. But now, he saw how natural it looked on him. As if this was how Ronan was originally designed to be.

Upon approaching, Ronan and Opal both looked up with adoration in their gazes.  
They scooted apart almost in sync as Opal patted the ground in between them.  
Adam used Ronan’s shoulder to lower himself down into the spot. A perfect fit.

Holding the silver bucket out soundlessly, Adam took a handful from it before looking to Ronan.  
He held his hand out to the animals.  
“Here, put your fingers together like this. You don’t want them biting a finger off.”  
Ronan demonstrated the correct way and Adam quickly learned.  
The animals muzzles felt like velvet against his palm. It tickled and he couldn’t help but smile.  
He took another handful to feed them.  
Opal leaned forward and licked some off his hand too.  
“ _Opal_!” Ronan chastised. “You’re being damn weird again.”  
Adam scrunched up his nose but he was still smiling.  
“You always put _your_ mouth on Adam,” Opal bit back slowly, her mouth forming awkwardly around the English words.  
Ronan’s face turned a warm shade that made Adam smirk quietly to himself.  
“ _Opal_!”  
She giggled and scrambled up on her hooves, trotting away to circle around the animals.  
Ronan shook his head, mouth twisted to the side in disapproval.  
“Sometimes I wish she’d have stayed in my head,” He grumbled with no real heat.  
“Well, I can definitely tell she came out of it,” Adam noted, eyeing Ronan through his peripherals.  
“Shut up, Parrish.”  
“You could always 'put your mouth on mine' and make me,” Adam said with a burst of confidence that he never would have had before, playfulness to his tone.  
Ronan looked shocked for a moment, then embarrassed, then in disbelief, then he smirked back.  
It was a multitude of emotions Adam wouldn’t have been able to picture on Ronan before.  
He always had such a thick mask before- one that now seemed to melt away whenever Adam was around.  
Adam loved every bit of it.  
He loved every bit of _him_.  
Ronan leaned forward and gently pressed his lips to Adam’s.  
It was in strong contradiction to the explosive storm Adam felt inside of him at the contact.  
The kiss deepened as Ronan dropped the bucket of feed and used his hands to pull Adam closer.  
Adam was vaguely aware of the animals circling them as they ate the food from the ground.  
When they broke apart, they were both breathing hard, feeling as if they’d just fell from the sky or jumped off of a moving train.  
“I don’t want to go back...” Adam breathed, mind suddenly jumping ahead to the fact that tomorrow he would have to drive back to college to start another semester without Ronan.  
It was strange how at home he felt here at The Barns with Ronan and Opal. Despite this, he knew he would go back to college. Adam was a hard worker and he was currently living his dream. Attending his dream school, on his way to success, and dating a dreamer himself. Ronan smirked, pulling away to pick up his bucket.  
The animals were pleased with the scattered food intermingled with the grass.  
“Never thought I'd see the day that Adam Parrish suggested he ditch school..." He was still smirking, eyes soft as he watched the animals eat. "Well, too bad- you can't. Ditching school is my thing, remember?”  
Adam’s mouth twitched.  
Something about that made his heart feel full again.  
Ronan never tried to be selfish with him. He never tried to stop him from doing something that he knew was good for him. He’d known Adam had worked his ass off to get into this ivy league school and he respected that.  
Ronan himself was the number one enemy of systematic education, but he knew Adam valued it and so he did his best to respect that too.  
Suddenly, Adam couldn’t keep it inside anymore. He was overflowing and his tiny heart couldn’t take it anymore.  
“I love you,” He said, voice quiet as the ghost of Ronan’s lips still drifted across his own. He said it like a fact. And it was.  
Adam knew Ronan loved him too. Ronan didn’t need words to express this. He’d always been more body language and action than he was spoken word- and Adam was more than okay with that.

He smiled softly at Ronan’s wide eyed gaze before using his shoulder to stand back up.  
Slowly, he circled the animals, hand grazing the top of a doe’s head. Her fur was soft between her twitching ears. She glanced up at him for the briefest of moments before deciding he was safe and going back to the food.  
He then went to where Opal was frolicking around with two dream bunnies. One had silver fur that glinted unnaturally in the sunlight. Chainsaw circled them from up above, cawing cheerily.  
He bent down as the little girl grabbed his hand forcing him to catch his balance and twirl around, knees bent awkwardly to stay at her height.  
She laughed mischievously as they spun in uneven circles, dancing an awkward yet happy dance.  
She began to turn him faster and faster until she lost her own balance and tumbled into the grass, Adam close behind.  
She shouted something joyous in her dream language that Adam couldn’t understand, tiny hand still clinging to his.  
He poked her nose and she pretended to try and bite him.

Suddenly, a shadow came over them and Adam glanced upward to see Ronan hovering over them.  
His face was warm and full of emotion.  
He slowly kneeled down and cupped Adam’s chin upside down, planting a warm kiss on his lips.  
It wasn’t nearly as intense as the last one but it was slow and certain and full of love. His nose bumped awkwardly on Ronan’s chin causing him to laugh, but the message was simple.  
‘I love you, too’, it said.  
Adam understood.  
Out loud, Ronan said, “That looked a hell of a lot better when Spider-man did it.”  
Adam barked out a laugh and Opal released his hand and scrambled away making a sound of disgust.

Adam realized now that he knew two things with certainty.  
One, he was _known _.__  
He'd even began to understand himself a little.  
And two, he was loved because of this.

**Author's Note:**

>  _Ignotus_ \- unknown


End file.
